What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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