I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
