I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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