i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I checked into jail on foursquare
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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