i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
