She's JV to your varsity
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
