i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Randomize
