brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
