Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
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