FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
