you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
