youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
