I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
