that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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