your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
