Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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