Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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