Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Randomize
