we have pet lesbian snakes
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
