i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize