i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
