and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
