:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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