Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
