He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
