what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
