honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I don't want my vagina anymore.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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