it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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