HIV tests are more positive than that guy
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
You need a sexual gate keeper
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
