It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
