Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
