Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
