I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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