On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
