The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
