I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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