Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
