If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
