I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
