OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
she peed on how many people?
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
