Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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