love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
