I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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