theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
