Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
