dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
