just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize
