would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
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