I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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