That's when you crack a 10am beer
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
