I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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